Say it OnLy if you mean it.

Monday, April 30, 2007 at 12:02 PM

seems quite free in the morning. so here i am, posting. having piano later in about half an hour then after that have to rush to school. waste money again, think it is gonna take about another 10bucks for the cab fare.

was so tired yesterday and slept at about 11. i put my phone on silent mode because i don't want to get disturbed by a stupid phone call or a msg. but, at about 2plus, my friend called and miraculously, i woke up and answer the phone. i cannot exactly remember the content but i was just surprised that it is him who called and i was able to wake up and pick up the phone. i think i am thinking abit too much.

To Mr Ho,
You always have my respect for you. You were the forever positive and jovial teacher i've ever met. Remember the days when i was still in secondary one, you were my form teacher and it was you that make me like my school days. We always agree that you were too soft on the whole class and we always want to you to scold the class for being so noisy but you never did. you were always so patient with us. your laughter is the what that bring us to what we are today. the way you teaches us, i may not be very be successful in life but i will remember everything that you have taught and you will never be forgotten. You, with the positive attitude, the optimistic character and the never say die spirit. You will never be forgotten. And lastly, rest in peace Mr Ho.

this shows how fast time pass... it has been a long time since i last step into my secondary school.. all my friends there and all the teachers that have taught us since we were in secondary one. my juniors are all taking their Os this year and to think that just some years ago, i was also like them, stressed and worrying about the exams.

Labour Day tomorrow but i still have to work. have no idea what time can i go but i hope that i can go at 2pm cause i'm very tired. Jas is already not coming to school today because she says that she is very tired after working on the weekends.

before i forgot, got kinda surprised when anson came back to HQ to work because he was still reluctant and not keen about the idea when i last talk to him. to think that he did not tell me anything! anyway, i hope that he will like it upstairs because most of his "better" friends are up there and he do not have to face my supervisor and i also hope that he will work long there because it is just no nice to keep changing jobs. =) i know he thinks that i'm a silly and young girl with all those childish thinkings but i am who i am and i just want to give you a helping hand in whichever way i can. and of course, i'm stubborn.

my piano starts in 6 minutes. i gotta go and get ready. see you!

somethings will never be forgotten. always in our heart.

R.I.P Mr Ho. Forever in my heart. You'll always be the best!

i'm taking forever to forget you.

Sunday, April 29, 2007 at 1:08 PM

another one of the fast and short post. just finishing changing the blogskin of my blog. just wanted something different for a change. i look through about 1000plus of blogskins but i just cannot find one that is suitable so in the end, i've decided on this one. i kinda proud of myself to be able to change everything and get the blogskin sucessfully on my blog. and i've also change the colour of my tagboard. =)

left about 40mins before i've to leave and then go for tuition. i really don't mind teaching but i guess it is just the stress when it there is exams because if the kid don't do well, not only will i feel quite guilty, the parent will also think that you don't have the capability to teach their child.

okay. i'm running out of time. i will post again tonight. if i have the time. =)

i'm taking forever to forget you.

Saturday, April 28, 2007 at 9:21 AM

here i am, working as usual. i think i'm slowly losing my voice soon. had a sore throat a few days back and now it has be worsen. i'm having cough now and a very bad running nose. i think it is because of the rain and the sudden change of the weather. i seriously hate the weather, it can be so sunny and bright in the morning but in the afternoon, the weather can change so badly, the heavy rain and the super strong wind. hope i can get better by next week, i really can't afford to be sick. there is just too much things for me to do and there must not be a delay.

i am just feeling so so sick. how i wish i would be at home sleeping in this cold weather. went gym with jas yesterday, now my body is also aching. was suppose to have lesson yesterday but last minute cancelled due to the lecturer taking MC. seriously ridiculous, i mean they only inform us last minute and if we were on our way then what? are we suppose to make our way home again. the school simply has no responsibility. anyway, since we had no school, so we just stayed in jas house and slack the whole afternoon. actually intended to go to the science centre since it has been a long time since we or rather i went there, but nat seems reluctant to go because she says that it is a waste of money. So in the end, we just stayed at home and watch "Holiday" by Cameron Diaz, Kate Winslet and Jude Law. overall, it was quite an interesting movie as it says there was 2 girls who got their hearts broken, then decided to go for a holiday and one of the girls then went on the net to look for a holiday location and then, she set eyes on the other girl's house as it look really nice and comfy. the only condition for the renting of the house was to have a house exchange, in other words, both of them will switch houses for two weeks. and then there, they meet their new love and you 'll see how they live together and all the things that they did to overcome the obstacles. it was a not bad movie but i wouldn't really recommend it if you want to watch a interesting movie.

i realise that i have been spending a lot of money this few days. i keep withdrawing money from the bank, not earning money but keep spending money and to think that i'm suppose to save money. =.= i just spent about 500bucks on driving yesterday, has been a long time since i went driving. sometimes thinking quite tired as the whole journey will take about 1 hour then after that still have to go driving. somehow getting kinda bored of it. and also the next TP date is so far apart, makes me feel even less motivated.

always ended up posting for a few hours, it is close to 2pm now. going home in a about half an hour. don't have any mood to post anyway. at the rate that i am coughing, i'm not surprise if i cough out blood the next time.

i just want to be treated the way i treat people.

i'm taking forever to forget you.

Thursday, April 26, 2007 at 11:36 PM

okay. i'm gonna make this post fast. i only have 10 minutes then i will have to go to bed. really very tired today. watch a chinese movie yesterday and slept only about 2plus, then meet jas at Wisma today then after that had lunch and kenneth fetch us to school. i was close to sleeping in class today. the lesson is so boring and the lecturer just ignored us. Irritating! after school, kenneth fetch me home and then i took my stuff and went to meet Ruth, played badminton and i think my legs are gonna break sooner or later. this is what happen when people don't exercise regularly. after that, kenneth came and played a few rounds of badminton too. after that, we went for dinner at the old airport hawker centre and i walked all the way home. it is not that far and it is healthy to walk after a meal, especially dinner.

tomorrow going gym with jas and after that to school. getting quite sporty nowadays. cause hua yu ask me to slim down and i'm going to prove it to him. but it is going to take alot of perserverance and persistance and also alot of time. but i'm going to do it, at least i hope so too.

i think being emo is not a bad thing. you get to live in your own world without caring about how people thinks and do whatever we like. it is not that i like to be like that but i guess that is my nature. not sharing problems with people and also sometimes feeling very moody. i will feel even more uneasy if i were to tell everything to everyone. i guess that is how people are different, some people needs advice so that he/she can have an idea of what to do whereas others, would want to listen to people's advice and then if they are the same with what they are thinking, then they will go ahead with their decision but if it is different, then they will probably listen but then, still go ahead with their own decision cause they still feel that they are correct. then the last type, would be people like me.

i think i can give advice to people very well but sometimes, when it comes to me, i'm really clueless on what to do. or if the same thing happen to me, i will be the total opposite as to of how i console people. thats why i said, saying is so much easier than doing it.

should stop. it is already more than 10minutes and tomorrow i have to wake up very early. feeling very sian already. thinking of having to run on the treadmill. =.=

how i wish, things would work my way.

ps: thanks kenneth for always fetching me home. appreciated. =)

i'm taking forever to forget you.

Wednesday, April 25, 2007 at 11:33 PM

was kinda emo for the past two days. don't know what happen to me, was so damm sad. thinking about what happen in the past but what the hell, it is all over already and i'm still like that. JUST FREAKING GET OVER IT!!!!

things are easier said than done.

for me, problems are suppose to kept to myself. i always feel that i can settle and solve everything by myself since it is me that create all this problems and i really don't like to get advice from people and yup, i'm stubborn.

nowadays, with the lesson starting only in the afternoon, the only way to go out would be in the morning or after lesson but after lesson already about 5plus and it is during the peak period and everywhere you go there will be alot of people and thats why i don't like to go out during that time. and therefore, i will be going out tomorrow morning with my dear Jas then after that, maybe meeting nat and kenneth for lunch. really hate having afternoon lessons. feel so restricted to go anywhere. and it is not for just one day, it is for the whole irritating semester!

intended to write longer but i've gotta settle some stuff and i'm watching a movie, so i'll probably
post tomorrow.

that's all folks!

to think that what i thought was true.

i'm taking forever to forget you.

Tuesday, April 24, 2007 at 11:10 PM

如果说我忘不了，我放不下，那么这就代表你赢了吗？因为你始终在我心里还占位子。明明说好放弃了，但是固执而不认输的我就是怎么劝也不没有办法履行诺言。真没用。为什么你总是让我不经意的想起你?

今天老毛病又犯了。那一份爱你的心又跑出来了。

真得很像一场拔河比赛。但是比赛的结果是不公平的因为原本只有两个人在玩的游戏，最后因为对方多了一个帮手所以我才会输的。其实也不能算是不公平因为在怎么说也是我先犯规的。是我先叫对手暂停比赛，真正错的是我。真的是自欺欺人。

为什么比赛早已分出胜负但是我还是死都不认输，就算是已经输得惨不忍睹，我还是厚着脸皮，死都不肯放弃。

或许，使我想忘也忘不了。或许，使我根本都不想忘掉。叫自己不要去想，但是我就是控制不了，为什么我要这么痛苦？每走的一步都是我选择的。为什么我这一生都是那么笨，做所有的事都是为了其他的人着想？做了这么多事但是最后什么都没得到，唯一得到的是更多的心碎和眼泪。这又何苦呢？

你说我是你口中的好朋友，但你问你自己，你几时把我当你的朋友看待？每时每刻都是我在看着你，大多数的事都是我在替你打点，可是对于这一切，你做了什么？就算是那一张道谢卡也不是你写的，还要找一个不相关的人把卡片送给我，我为你做了那么多事情，难道也换不了你的诚意吗？

就算是很普通的朋友都有心去记得我的生日，那么你这位自称我是你的好朋友的你，为什么都没有任何德表示？我想你不是忘了我的生日，而是根本都不知道我的生日是什么时候。我不希望你有很大的惊喜给我，我所期待和渴望的只是你对我说一句生日快乐，难道这一切也比不上一句生日快乐吗？

我曾经拥有我的机会，只是我没把握那次的机会。我想，那么奇迹般的机会永远都不会再轮到我了。一切的一切都结束了，或许这一切根本都没有发生过。或许这一切都是我单方面的想法。那个又笨又愚蠢的我。

一切都画上了句点。

i'm taking forever to forget you.

Sunday, April 22, 2007 at 11:44 AM

today's the last day of torture. i should be getting used to all this since this is not the 1st time that i'm working this kind of shift but it is just that there is too much difference from the weekdays and the weekends. i have more than 6hrs sleep on the weekdays but during days when i am working, i only manage to sleep for 5hrs or less. how can i adapt to it?

stupid kenneth disturb me today. say wait for 6am so can disturb me. this kind of people really too free and seriously nothing to do. don't know can sleep don't want to sleep. 生在福中不知福。i was so willing to exchange my whole month's pay so that he can replace me today. but he don't want and he say that i will cheat him. but i don't think i am that kind of person.

okay.. i slowly falling asleep, there is really nothing to do. just sitting here and staring at the computer screen. no customers and no phone calls. this is going to kill me.. i still have a long way to go. i finish work at 2 then i've got tuition all the way until 8pm. i am so damm tired. every week's the same thing. one thing good is that we will be starting school at 2pm so it won't be that bad.

nowadays kids are so fortunate. right now at P6, they are already constantly on the computer. connected to the internet, playing online games and also getting into msn. let me think, when i was in P6. the games i played was zeropoint, crocodile and other kinds of kiddish games that people at that time play. and they have their own phone! they are so lucky, with new and colour screen phones. at my time, it is a shared phone with my sis and it is a black and white screen. times really changed...

running out of ideas.. my brain has stop functioning.. what i need most now is sleep, sleep and more sleep. i'm left with one more hour and i will be outta here.

something that i've learnt lately. but i think i can accomplish it.

只要笑一笑，没什么事情过不了。

i'm taking forever to forget you.

Saturday, April 21, 2007 at 10:13 AM

finally!!!! exams are finally over!! i don't know how long have i waited for this moment. i don't care about the results now, that will be about 2 months time. i don't have confidence in any of the papers but all i want is just a pass. everyone around me says that this is one of the many times that they have work and study so hard for the exams but to me, i think this is one of the "slackest" exam that i have. i was suppose to be studying but i just cannot focus. don't know what happened to me, probably, i'm really not cut out for studying and if that is the case, then i will probably need to consider if i am really signing up for the degree course.

today's a havoc. bus to sunway lagoon was suppose to come at 8a.m but the bus only arrive at 8.45a.m. and the bus number also have to change 3 times. me and my colleague was scolded like shit. somemore that bus is a chartered bus so we were surrounded by the whole group and we were just sitting there defendless. there was really nothing we can do and we had already tell them what had happen but they just refused to listen. we have pride too, they were scolding so loud that a lot people was watching and i think my colleague cannot stand the stress and she just broke down. i just think that it is unfair for us, it is not like we are not trying our best to find a solution for you. and if i were to give a specific time that the bus will arrive, then what if the bus did not come at that time, won't i even be reprimanded even more jia lat? that's why i don't like to promise anyone anything if i am not confident of. accidents do happen and if i can predict everything , then i won't be sitting here. i will probably be a fortune teller or some people that sit outside of temples and read your palms and tell you about your life.

but seriously, i'm not affected by what they said because, and i guess i'm already immune to it. this is not the first time that i got scolded and this won't be the last time. you can shout for whatever you want and i don't think that it is me that is losing face but it is you. i think i manage my anger quite well. so proud of myself. =) if people don't mind queueing for more than one hour for a box of donuts, then why can't they wait for a little while more for their bus? i don't think shouting will make the bus come faster. the bus used diesel and not your sound energy.

enough of all this. don't want to spoil my mood. not too much sleep today but then i feeling not too bad. i think probably because i've finish my exams and i am just relieved and can't be bother with other things.

school's starting soon. on monday, want to finish the course as soon as possible.. school's good but just that i am just getting sick and tired of it. going to school, not studying but just lazing my days away. it is just not the way to study and also, i don't think i have the mood to study anymore.

something that i've learnt.

其实，简单的，就是最好的。

i'm taking forever to forget you.

Sunday, April 08, 2007 at 9:22 PM

woke up at 4a.m today. woke up feeling super groggy all thanks to that stupid "horror movie" that was not scary at all. i bought the movie yesterday "The Unseeable" because it says that it is the scariest movie after "Shutter" but it turns out to be just some kind of stupid cheat people movie. the only scariest part is just the look on the people's face. other than that, everything sucks and it is just another typical storyline. and thus, i only slept at 1 just to see that show.

after brushing up, then we went to fetch my grandparents to go to the cemetery. i slept all the way there, i was so so tired, having to wake up so early for the past few days. we reach there about 5.30am. there was about 6 of us but we only brought one pathetic torchlight and the sky is so dark that we have no idea on what we walking on. then, my dad, using my handphone's mini torchlight, went to look for the tombstone. he walk so far that my uncle also went to look for it. the remaining of us were standing there and waiting when my grandfather said that it can't be that far then he start to shone the torchlight around and there it was, my great-grandfather's tombstone was just a few steps away. strange isn't it? anyway, what happen next is just some normal rituals so i don't have to write about it. feeling kinda lazy.

after the whole thing, we reach home about 8 plus and i just went straight to bed. feeling really tired, after getting all that smoke into my eyes and climbing up and down. so i slept all the way till about 1plus. have been a long long time to wake up at that time. anyway, got ready and went for tuition. same old thing.

that's my sister. i forced her to take this picture. =.=

that is the spiderman that comes with the box of cornflakes i bought. my sis took some difficulty to find it. there was only one among so many boxes of cornflakes.

just found out that i failed my practical exam (piano). not exactly in a good mood. really was not suprised that i failed but at the same time, i know that i did badly but just that.. it is just stupid. i know that i have the skill but it is just because of my nervousness. really angry at myself. i'm pretty sure that i can pass but because i panic and then my hands just don't want to listen to me. super pissed.

no more mood. everything sucks.

never ever the same again.

i'm taking forever to forget you.

Saturday, April 07, 2007 at 10:02 AM

trying to be special. i'll try to type everything in chinese. since i'm working and obviously very free.

今天早上做工, 根本就是在吃蛇。都没有什么人。只是小猫两三只，跟昨天的状况差很多。我还是比较习惯忙一点，因为这样时间会快一点过。

i give up. i'm really clueless when it comes to typing everything in chinese. i really don't know what to write! so means that in those chinese shows when they are typing chinese words so fast and accurate, it is all BLUFF! i spend like so long to type that few words. have to figure out the hanyu pinyin and which is the words and it is so so troublesome. never attempt to act smart again. it's stupid.

but seriously, there was really no one in the morning and to compare, yesterday, we had 23 coaches to Genting at 7am but today, there is only 1 bus to Genting. really alot of difference and whats more, the bus today was also not full today. ridiculous. then me and my colleague was like slacking thoughout. reading papers and entertaining ourselves. super free.

having tuition again later. i think i will have to take a cab because i just cannot reach there on time if i were to travel by bus. i will definitely be late and after that, i will have to take another cab again otherwise i will be late for another tuition. real crammed. and i will only finish at about 6pm. lucky tomorrow i will not be working, already got someone to replace me. will be going to sao mu. i will go with my grandma every year. i just find it kinda interesting and i really enjoy doing it even though it is very tiring and it gets real hot. but it is just for the experience and also to show that i care for my great-grandfather. even though i've not seen him before.

don't feel like a saturday. i think partially it's because we went to our grandma house yesterday and there is too few people working today. it just feels like a normal day. no one and even the phones are not ringing as much as they used to. just feel so weird, so few people and nothing to do, really gonna be bored to death. just sitting here, look here, look there....

i think i'm going to play game. no more posting.

where is everyone?

i'm taking forever to forget you.

Friday, April 06, 2007 at 10:18 AM

a lesson to be learn. no more mocha if i am working the next day. i really cannot sleep yesterday! it was so horrible. feeling really tired but cannot sleep. no more coffee next time. anyway, no coffee means good too. coffee= caffeine= cannot sleep and also, most importantly, FAT. and hua yu says i need to jian fei. ya,i know.

my daddy's coming back today! so happy. he has already gone for a month already. hope that he won't have to go back so soon! there is always laughter and alot of lame jokes when he is around. i just love having my dad around.

very very bored. in the morning was abit high, cause it is obvious that i do not have enough sleep but now, i'm bored. real bored. no one around to talk to me and no one to play games with me. don't know where is jus now. i think she will be back today but then. i don't know what time. customs are jamming like mad and the phones are ringing like crazy. i think coming back on sunday will also be the same. the customs will definitely crammed like shit. all the coaches from everywhere is coming in to singapore because it will be a school day and a working day on monday. no more holiday. no matter weekend or weekdays, it is the same for me. no difference. weekends and public holidays , i have to work and for weekdays, i have to go to school. so no difference. it is the same for me.

okay. i'm really really bored. did not bring my books cause i thought that i would be very busy throughout my whole shift. but i'm stuck here posting. no photos today cause i'm in the office. don't really feel like working anymore. i've been wishing for a long time. to sleep till i wake automatically and not by the sound of alarm clock or the phone ringing. tomorrow another long day and sunday is not of any difference. then the next monday will be the study week, how to sleep peacefully? i intend to wake up every morning to study but it will be a plan. i hope that i can fulfill it.

since, i am so free, i shall gossip about people. Mr Wee, to be honest, i'm not angry with you or so to speak, i don't even feel that i have the right to be angry. but, i'm just disappointed. you ownself say that i called you 32 times. but you still went back to sleep. don't want to talk about it. what is past is the past.

right now, i'm thinking of whether to go for the degree course. firstly, it is too costly and i don't think my parents will be able to afford it and i also don't know if they want to pay for me. partially, the reason that i don't want to join because i'm afraid that i cannot cope with the work because right now, i already don't understand what the lecturers are talking half of the time or in fact, most of the time. and the degree course is going to be a lot more stressful. with project and thesis to complete. i really don't know. i think i will go if my mum pays for me but... i'm always so contradicting. can't stand myself.

okay. i stopping. going to buy 4D and play game. that is the only thing to do when i'm working. there is no one here, except of course, the colleagues. waiting for 2pm to come so i can go. waiting, waiting, waiting.....

when will it be my turn or there will never be?

i'm taking forever to forget you.

Wednesday, April 04, 2007 at 10:27 PM

tomorrow will be the official day for the starting of studying of exams. Declare War!!! not much confidence but i will survive!! *lame*

abit of mind blank. but if i don't blog then i don't know when i will have the time to blog again. studying tomorrow and then friday, saturday, sunday, working at 6am. think i will probably die on monday.

okay. talk on something long. jas is on the phone with me and trying to change the chinese lyrics into other dialects and it sound so horrible. imagine say you love me becomes "kong lei ai wo". =.= today, jas is so cheena, ask me to send chinese songs and singing chinese songs all the way. "ai wo fei ni mo shu".... and she is not interested in stopping.. gary and tank are on her top lists. she can be a lyrics writer, singing and changing the songs lyrics on the spot.

enough talking about her. a proper answer to the question. if i were to have a crush on someone and then if he were to have a girlfriend then i will probably forget the whole thing. and even if he were to appear again, i will never though of being with him because it is already over. no point going back to the past. maybe i am not answering kenneth's question but my own. just trying to convince myself over some stupid long ago problem.

got a B for my BIS project. was kinda surprised because it is a super last minute project and i just did it anyhow. i don't wish for an A or B for BIS. just give me a pass and i'll be happy. there are like so many questions to study for the exam and how to do so much things in one week time? i wonder how much did we get for the MM project. sad thing cause Dr Lee says that the marks will not be reveal. then how do we know how well do we score? super wasted.

that is jas doing that stupid expression. she asked me to put her photo in my blog because it will be more interesting. hmm. lets see.

this will be all the things that i will miss after the adv dip. no more crazy moments and laughing till get stitches times. everything will be OVER. gonna miss everyone and especially the crazy huayu. he is just such kai xin guo. always making people around him laugh.

i really got no more ideas and no more inspiration on what to write even though i want to write more. guess forcing will not be the right way.

to walk on or to grab hold of what's left behind?

i'm taking forever to forget you.

Tuesday, April 03, 2007 at 9:22 PM

exams are coming, and nat is stressing me over the phone. tomorrow's the last day of school before exams start. i did not go to thai lesson today, was spending my time, sleeping. really very tired. has been a long where i can spend the time at night sleeping because the past few weeks, i have been coming home only at night. where got extra time to sleep?

anyway, we gave jas present to her today. finally, after close to a month. feel so sorry. anyway, hope she will like it.

this is what we gave her. Homemade edible cookies!

all this are the pictures for jas birthday card. abit long ago. all this are all handmade. even though the piece of artwork is not up to standard, but i've to say, that is the best that i can do, and i am also proud of it. =)

i think i should put more photos. then in this way, i don't have to write so much words. and i think it will be much more interesting.

just for an update, my maths question is still not solve. i really don't know what to do, i've ask so many people but all gave me the same answer. don't know how to do. just can't believe that i cannot solve a simple P6 maths question.

shall blog again asap. i'm not concentrating.

just can't believe all this luck.

i'm taking forever to forget you.

Sunday, April 01, 2007 at 7:00 AM

because of the virus in my computer, it deleted everything that i wrote yesterday even though i remember saving it. thanks to that virus that i have to write everything all over again. THANKS!

everyone is leaving... jus is going to m'sia this morning and will only be back on friday, next week. and then mr charming will be going to thailand today. and i don't know when he will be coming back. he is telling me two weeks later but, he is full of changes.. everything can change for him since now, he does not have any work commitments anymore. why is everyone going overseas? i want to go too but there is no one to accompany me. bored. people either have no money or just some other stupid excuses.

one maths question and it takes 4, 5 people to solve it. but, it still remain unsolved. don't understand how did i manage to get through my primary school life. really don't like maths, and the reason is because i can't solve them. don't understand how people can think and solve the question but i cannot. so i kinda admired them, for being always that "powerful". i guess, if i would have studied harder for my PSLE, i would have been in a better school and in a better stream. not that my school is not good but it would have been better if i was in express stream. just can't imagine how naive i used to be, to think without studying, i would be able to get good scores and get to a good secondary and into the express stream. it is just like when i was in secondary school. i was hoping that i can get into either JC or Poly but turn out, into a private institution. never expect too much from yourself. you will end up getting even more disappointed. not that private institution is not good but it is alot of difference in terms of their diploma recognition. and more moeny will be spend on the private school.

linking to the topic, my advance diploma is already halfway through and exams are coming. the whole course will be ending in july and we'll really start to step into society and start working. was actually thinking about the bachelor degree but i don't think i will be able to afford it. and i think everything will be totally different. really good friends now will not even be talking after the diploma. it always happen, everytime after something ends, then all the friends will be spread out and if you are lucky, then you will be able to talk to him on MSN but if not, you all will never get to talk to each other again. it happen in primary and secondary and now.. i really hate that feeling. it means that all the friends that we made in the diploma course are just superficial. being friends just because you are in class together almost everyday. and being friends just because you are close to each other and not because you are being true. whatever. it always happen.

nat was dicussing with me that we need more than 24hrs a day. probably 36hrs will do. we have so much to do, but there is simply not enough time. everyday, we rush and rush, and when we are in the midst of something, it will be so late that we will have no choice to sleep, otherwise, we will be like walking zombies the next day. Okay. maybe it is just me but 24 hrs is simply not enough. if only time would stop. then we will have plenty of time. but if your time really stop, then it is time to go and change the batteries of your clock. they probably ran dead of batteries. sorry. i'm just being lame.

i also realise that i've been very stress lately.. i was walking from the food court back to my office. on the way, i was walking so fast that my friend said that he cannot take my speed. haha. guess i am used to walking so fast because everywhere i go, i am always rushing. no matter where i'm going, i will be rushing. always rushing for time. horrible bad habit. but another thing that i realise is that, nowadays, i eat my food very slowly, i still can't find the reason and it has seriously nothing to do with me, talking alot and therefore not eating. but i just eat so fast as compared to before. anyway. under observation, i think i will be able find out the reason/s.

a simple post and i've been posting for about 5hrs. of course it is not like continueing posting but in between having some breaks or having to serve customers. don't want to think anymore. tired.

it is just not the same anymore. or probably never was.

i'm taking forever to forget you.