Say it OnLy if you mean it.

Sunday, July 29, 2007 at 1:04 PM

today is a bad day to start with. early in the morning, when i was waiting for a cab to go to work, one guy that works in grassland and also happen to stay in the same building as me, walk all the way infront of me and then put up his hands to get a cab when he had alreay saw me waving for it. that is so irritating! what kind of gentleman is this. i seriously dislike and detest this kind of people. damm rude!

he spoilt my whole mood and the customers today were also just as irritating. they were all like so paranoid and nervous and they simply cannot wait. if i am free, i will definitely give you eye contact and motion you to come but they were like practically shoving the invoice in my face! it is not as if our bus is leaving soon. our bus leaves at 7am and the time was not even 6.30 yet. and some more the seats are all allocated so even if you come early, it doesn't means that you will be able to get the best seats. singaporeans are really kiasu! (i'm a singaporean too but i don't think i'm kiasu to this extent!)

there are so many things that can make me flare up easily, seriously, sometimes i think people purposely make you lose your temper and when you show them, then they will say, can't you be more nice? but how when you the one that is constantly irritating me? if i were to work in this field for a very long time, then i think i must be prepared to die earlier. everyday my blood pressure so high.

i think i will be damm touched if a guy do this to me.
我希望
你会因为我变得快乐一些
我不会让你再多掉一滴眼泪
如果一朵玫瑰换你一天笑颜
我会送你全世界的玫瑰
this was taken from one of the song lyrics. i just find it super cool and meaningful and touching too.

yeah! half and hour more and i will be free!!! but i'm still very tired. waiting for the rest of the people to come back so i can go to the toilet. wondering if i should go to my grandma's house today. kinda troublesome to travel to so far and then just for that little while and then i will be going home. anyway, now that i'm so free the next week, i will probably try to update as much as possible. that's all for now. see ya folks!

probably you are not even worth it.

i'm taking forever to forget you.

Saturday, July 28, 2007 at 11:15 AM

amd FINALLY! the exams are over! went to a few people's blog and the first thing i see would be also FINALLY. guess it is the best word to describe everyone's feelings. everyone must be so glad to leave this class. well, i would have to say that i'm kinda reluctant but to compare, of course i would be very happy to be able to leave too.

i'm still so lack of sleep. this few days only had about4 to 5 hours of sleep. feeling so tired. so many things that i want to explain, so many things that i want to say.

i was daydreaming yesterday and i realise, yesterday is really the last time that we will all be together as a group. it is not that we won't be meeting but i would say that the chances will really be very little and we will probably won't be as close as before. yup, and like what jas say, i'll miss those times that we were all sitting together and always arguing. those are the good memories. =)

if everything goes well, monday, we'll all be going for tau huay after desperate housewives. then going for badminton the next day. was thinking of watching movie after that. if kenneth sees this, wanna watch movie on tuesday? i'm really interested in watching that horror movie! please say yes. =) (i sound despo but friends around all are either too busy or they don't dare to watch)

okay. i've been thinking whether to continue working at five stars. now that i've no school already and then it's kinda tiring to work at 6am for the weekend. but, if i were to not work, then i would lose a source of income. i'm already very broke now.

***

just came back home. didn't realise that it is already so late. and i still have work tomorrow! so bored. had pasta for dinner. really full and happen to met ruth there. was thinking of going out with her. now i'm psycho-ing someone to go somewhere so everythings not confirm yet. hope i will succeed but i seriously doubt so. when that person makes up his mind, he will not change. and so, that's sad.

i want to go thailand!!!!! i so miss that place, the kind people there and the music and also the culture but most importantly, also the shopping there. bugis is holding a thai fair there and they are thai goods and food. when i was walking around, they were all like talking in thai to each other and for that little moment, i imagined that i was in thailand. i'm so home sick!!! i wanna go there and marry a thai! preferably someone rich and nice-looking and MY age. HAHA. =)

i need solutions, i need people to tell me that i'm doing the right thing. i just feel that this is not going to work out and i don't want to keep dragging it. i know that i'm already near the edge of the cliff. i'm just a step away from falling off it. part of me wants to go forward but the other part of me holds me back. so at the end, i'm left in the middle, going no where. but i really do want to make a conclusion and get a solution. i know i'm super contradicting but that's me.

alright. i'll stop complaining already. need to sleep otherwise i will looking like a big fat panda tomorrow. kenneth, please say yes!!! =)

as much as i hope to be happy, i know it's quite hard.

everyone around me is all having fun going out but i'm stuck at home with my work that starts at 6am! not fair la!

i'm taking forever to forget you.

Thursday, July 19, 2007 at 12:39 PM

i'm feeling so so lazy. wanted to start study but..... how to pass like that? i didn't even study much yesterday. feeling so tired now.

just accompanied my dad to the lasik clinic at paragon. my dad is feeling "hiao" nowadays. he had his eye "lasered" so he won't have to wear glasses anymore. he is complaining that he has been wearing glasses for the past 30 years and now it is time for a change. the doctor says that he only have to do it for one eye. he told me the reason but till now i still have'nt figured out what it means. its complicated. anyway, now he has some plastic cover covering his right eye (i think, i forgot which one it is) and he is taking sleeping pill to make him go to sleep.

okay. i'm gonna start studying at 1.30pm which is about 13 mins from now. hopefully i would be able to get some work done.

feeling so bored. having tuition later at 6.30pm. kinda don't feel like going. my whole body is aching from yesterday's badminton and my legs are all full of bruises. i think i will get a cab back later. seriously feeling so lazy.

study study study. i just seriously can't wait for everything to end, then i can really take a break by not worrying about my exams or studies.

not working this weekend, so probably will be able to get more sleep. i'm feeling sleepy again. i'm really a big fat pig. HAHA.

no comments to that someone today. will probably reply you another day. i will always have to think very hard of what to write to you. =)

my cousins. =)

my mind running all around. trying to locate you somewhere. putting you in my heart.

i'm taking forever to forget you.

Saturday, July 14, 2007 at 10:43 AM

rather than sitting here doing nothing, i thought of just posting since this is the best way to waste time and also time pass very fast whenever i'm posting. i don't know why.

was almost late for work today. was trying to put in my stupid contacts lar. they just can't fit into my eyes. or rather, my eyes keep blinking. irritating. i reach at 0609am, just one more minute then i will be late. but sad that i cannot claim my cab fare but luckily it was only $3.50. cheap cheap.

to that someone:
some things may had already happen, but if i'm making that effort, why can't you too? well, the choice is yours, i can't force things to be what i want it to be. and if our friendship will still be standing now, doesn't this means that we are both actually stronger than what we thought?

i agree that to what you said but do you think i would have the choice? you don't expect to see me being grumpy all day long and i'm not telling you all these things so that you can dislike this particular person, i'm telling you because you are my friend. you don't see me going around telling people about all my stuff and in fact, i don't even tell it to anyone else. but whatever it is, we may not be back to before but i hope that we will be better than before. =)

HAHA, jus still have 10.5hours more to go while i only have 2.5hours more. talk about being fair. =)

i'm so so bored. nothing to do.........

feel like drinking today, i don't know why. becoming an alcoholic soon. i want drinks that can make me drunk. i'm so tired and irritated of everything that is happening.

i was just thinking, so what now? what will happen? life is just so much different and i guess it will be a bigger change for you when you meet different people. how how? i'm so clueless. i'm trying already but i need more time. i just refuse to believe that i cannot do such a simple thing. since i've already made a vow to myself, i will try harder and perservere to the end. it is not me to give up halfway.

就算跌倒了，我还是会鼓起勇气站起来。永不放弃！

i just hope things will get better and wish that everything will come in my way.

i'm taking forever to forget you.

Friday, July 13, 2007 at 10:08 AM

11/07/07 marks the last day of our advance diploma course. people are all going their separate ways. so many thing are going to be different now. this is the time where we are really going to step into society and work. no more playing around.

i'm gonna miss everything. the times where the bunch of us played around, thinking of it, really everything.

just some random photos that shows our life when we were together...

this was taken at our old workplace. (jas looking toot)

this was in the cab when both nat and kenneth did not come to school. *bad kids*

the guys acting stupid. (as usual =.=)

during exam period. the exams are all killing us!

jas trying to act glam in class. bleah!

this was us at the APB. all drunk.. hahas.

guys, this is the reason why we always took so long in the toilet! we are vain girls. =))

another pic of the guys acting dumb. HAHA. (notice hy face looks the same)(we encourage creativity friend!)

this was so long ago! i think only nat looks normal here.

me and kenneth at town res.

we just loved the toilet!

thats how hardworking we are in class. =)

jas and me trying to be les. =.=""

another reason to be in class! to take lots and lots of photos!!!

The last photo of us being together.

my all time good friend. don't we all just this pic, nice scenery.

Last but not least, how can we forget her?

our "good friend". nat is so going to kill me for putting this.

that's all folks. that is all i have. hope that will be new photos of all of us. i so miss you guys. good luck for all your papers. i've gotta go. meeting nat. =) tata!!!

i'm missing you...

i'm taking forever to forget you.

Sunday, July 08, 2007 at 10:14 AM

another day with only 4 hours of sleep but surprisingly, i am not feeling as tired as last week.i don't know why i cannot sleep so i only manage to fall asleep only at 1am.

i've got a confession to make. i did not go to work this saturday because i went to kbox with huayu and nat. i'm sorry justina, had to ask you to cover for me because if i were to go to work, i think i would have died. i think huayu came to fetch me at 12 and then we reach amk's kbox at about 1am. were there cause bing's working as captain over there and therefore was given some kind of discount. the total bill was 72bucks. so expensive even though bing has already waive off one person's cover charge. it was fun though, can't really sleep that night because i kinda keep hearing huayu singing in the background. haha.

later still having tuition. will be finishing at 6.15pm then rushing down to my grandma's place. don't know whether taking cab or bus. still considering. money issues.

last friday had a new tuition kid. primary 2 small boy and he is so cute. so forgetful but so adorable. =) but i forgot what is his name and rather i didn't really ask for his name. smart right. =.=

tomorrow would be going for manicure with the girls in the morning and then heading to school after that. then i think jas would be coming with me back home and then we will meet the others at 7pm. having dinner with them.

tuesday no school. going out with my darling jas. HAHA.

alright. shall stop. kinda getting sleepy. n0thing to do. except talk to jus beside me. supp's here today. so no messing around. still've got 3hours till its time for me to go. bored bored.

爱你的心在也不会出来了.我已经把它藏好了.

to do something that i want to do

i'm taking forever to forget you.

Sunday, July 01, 2007 at 10:59 AM

if i would have known, i seriously would not have come to work. there was just a minimal number of envelopes and we have 4 people working. absolutely crazy. and to think that i have only had 4 hours of sleep. was slacking yesterday at my aunt's house. playing with her two silky terriers and the adults were all doing what they like to do. "dry swimming".

i'm so tired. was kinda slacking at work just now because there was no one and i was just feeling very tired. just had my breakfast and i am slightly awake now. i think later i would dozing off again. it always happens. i've already planned what i will be doing today. later i would be having tuition then after that i am taking a bus down to my grandma's house. no more cabs. it is becoming more and more "unaffordable" for me. and since it would be a long ride to my grandma's house, i would be taking a nap on the bus. this is careful and good time management. =)

was having breakfast with my soon-to-be ex colleague. he told me alot of things. and i realise, people can really do everything for the sake of money or position. he told me to be very careful with all the people around me and people that are good to me may not be really good and things are not as simple as we see or what we think. i just can't believe that it is happening. seriously.

oh my. i'm slowly dozing off again. i cannot control it. how i wish i can go home now. there is still about 2 hours till 2pm and i am dead tired. still have 2 hours of tuition later. i'm just afraid that i might fall asleep halfway.

alright. i shall and i need to stop. i need to go and walk walk.

i'm taking forever to forget you.